lies

Here lies Lindsey…

1. She saved herself until marriage.
2. Her love for animals went beyond that of a normal human.
3. She loved all people.
4. She never said an unkind word.
5. Her personal motto was modest is the hottest.
6. She was so humble. She once wrote a book about sex is meant to be between one man and one woman and missionary being the only way.
7. She was always level headed.
8. Her family was a quiet group of people that she cherished deeply.
9. She died never having an orgasm, and was happy about it.
10. Masturbation was the devil’s own creation, and as her one last dying wish, she asks you to never partake.