slave to the guilt

You’ll never know.

How guilty I feel.

All the time.

I hurt you.

I broke that safe container I worked so hard to create.

You’ll never know.

The punishments I give myself.

For what I have done.

Gut wrenching. Sick to my stomach.

I can’t imagine the sickness for you that I have caused.

I did it wrong. I did it so wrong.

I can’t apologize. The wound is too deep.

I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry.

I’m sorry I failed you. I made a mistake and it cost you.

There was no repair. Just rupture.

You’ll never know how sorry.

The flogging should be mine.

I’ll take it with understanding.

You’ll never know.

I deserve what ever comes.

I will accept the consequences of my actions.